I took a walk while it was raining just now, with my umbrella. And I realised so many things. That I've been missing out on all the good things in life. Food, especially. For once, sleep felt relaxing, not a waste of time anymore. Stoning felt awesome, eating makes me feel good. Somehow, I don't feel like continuing to live. No, not that I want to kill myself or anything like that. But, just stop whatever I'm doing right now. I just want everything to stop and go away. I want to be calm and just be free. I don't want to go to school. Forget about the Director's List or whatsoever. I don't want any of that. I don't even want to care and bother about any of those. Why can't I just do crazy stuff and run far away with the people that I love ? Take a leap and just be fearless, can I ? I just want to do what I want and love to do. Sometimes, I wish the universe slows down for a moment, or just stop spinning for a while, you know ? So that I could spend time with my friends, my love ones and just be happy. Yes, that's all I want right now, the only thing. Happiness.